“A Handy Tip For the Easily Distracted” by Miranda July - NOWNESS (by NOWNESS)
With my great surprise, having the criteria now clear in my mind changed the way I looked at them. It was no longer “I like it,” but: “Was the illustrator honest, or he just wanted to please?” and: “Would have I liked this when I was eight, or thirteen?” and: “Is there something new in this work?”
Imagine now that you’re playing your own game. Before you start you ask yourself a few important questions. What are the rules? What does one have to do to win? Is it played on a field? For how long? With how many competitors? Do I even want to play? This game is yours and it’s played exactly the way you want it to be.
At a young age, our mother instilled in us social graces that I’ve come swear by. She explained that it’s OK to smile at a stranger or an acquaintance, even if they don’t smile back. That picking up the phone to tell someone you were thinking about them can turn a bad day into a better one. To do your best to be nice to because everyone is battling something. That hatred can be killed with grace and kindness. And most importantly, hurtful and passive aggressive remarks made towards you are really a reflection of how someone feels about themselves.
Such a good reminder that we really don’t need the material things that fill our lives. This year I started a journal project with my daughters. Instead of things – we write about what we find funny or put in photos of the moments we share. My 12 year old daughter and I just made pajamas together. I’m sure she will outgrow them in 6 months but she wrote about the day we spent together and how everything that could go wrong did- a memory she now will always have because we laughed about it.
Simply put, if we get enough DMT (the spirit molecule, pumped from our pineal gland when we are dreaming or dreamy) and oxytocin (the love and bonding hormone from breastmilk, which is absent in formula milk) as children, we won’t have to look for substitutes as adults. Emotionally nourished children grow up independent, loving, happy and stable.
You call me,
“Little lady, pretty girl, beautiful woman.”
But I am not any of these things for you.
I am exploding light,
my daughter will be exploding light,
better cover your eyes.
Rape Culture (Cover Your Eyes)
“Everything takes time. Bees have to move very fast to stay still.” ―David Foster Wallace, Brief Interviews with Hideous Men